Body Image Issues

I’m OK with Not Being Perfect

Every person is different and that’s what makes them unique and actually perfect in themselves.

The concept of perfection has become so flawed and yet so rampant that many of us have started comparing ourselves to everyone on social media. There are many aspects of comparison but comparing the shape and size of bodies is the most common. Daily we look enviously at models, skinny moms, actresses and even at our neighborhood lady. While comparing, we forget that everybody not only has different body types but also completely different lifestyles and priorities. This is where Body Positivity comes in.

Body Positivity Articles
It’s human nature to compare and proliferation of social media has made it very easy. Isn’t it funny how many of us end up losing our mental peace for something that is not even worth it most of the times? There’s no smartness in valuing your body over your being.

I was never skinny but never fat either. By the time I entered late thirties, I started seeing changes in my body. I gained weight easily and didn’t seem to lose it easily. Then I got pregnant and put on another 10 kilograms. I lost it all within two months of delivery but didn’t lose many inches and soon after, I started gaining weight again.
I started walking and some exercise but couldn’t get regular thanks to mommy duties. We live in a nuclear setup and don’t have full time maids which meant that I couldn’t find time for my own health. Rather than going crazy, I decided to look at Body Positivity. A good thing I have started during this time is intermittent fasting which helps even though I end up eating sweets quite often. The guilt creeps up but still self-control isn’t my forte. Who can I blame then?

body positivity
Rather than wanting a toned body without doing much about it, I have started to take things as they come. I feel good now that I have decided to take things as they come, I’ve become more confident.

You might say that you are doing everything and still very far from your ideal weight; it can just be your body type or maybe you need a little more time. The plan should be to never give up on yourself. Fat or thin, you need to love yourself. It’s not that I don’t want to lose 10 kgs but I have accepted that it will take some time. Till then, I try to pose in flattering angles and embrace Body Positivity 😛
I’m okay with not being perfect
‘Cause that’s perfect to me
‘Cause that’s perfect to me
‘Cause that’s perfect to me

Do you also feel that awareness about Body Positivity is important?

I thank Priyanka Sehgal who blogs at https://mommynshanaya.wordpress.com for introducing me. She is a dear friend who writes about things close to her heart on her blog. I would also take the opportunity to introduce Sthuti Panigrahy Singh who blogs at https://mommyaccountsays.wordpress.com.

It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers, am celebrating Women’s Day with a twist. This post is a part of #UnapologeticGirlz Blogathon hosted by @mylittlemuffin_mom @mommyvoyage and @themomsagas, sponsored by @kaurageousyou.

Self Love Quotes

How I Discovered Self Love by Shaking Things Off

Shake it off, shake it off…

Self Love is our first and last love & this song ‘Shake It Off’ by my favourite Taylor Swift speaks my mind.

I never fitted in the standards that our society has set for being ‘beautiful’. Being dusky with average features and glasses is hardly what one will call a pretty girl. My friend was fair and was pleasant to look at. Even though we were always together, I could never shake off the feeling that she is getting compliments, getting noticed while I was just ‘her friend’.

Not just looks, I never felt confident about any of my capabilities. I was always shy about saying what I wanted. My parents didn’t pay attention to this thing and never really encouraged me to speak up. In my home, we did what our father said and that was it. I was so timid that I kept doing things, I didn’t actually want. I got my real voice only after marriage but wasn’t able to shake off the feeling of not being able to realize my potential in the direction I wanted.

Self Love Images

And then came motherhood with a whole new set of expectations and dos and don’ts. They said that babywearing is bad for baby’s bones. They said that you should have continued breastfeeding your baby till she was 3. They said that you should have lost all the pregnancy weight in a year. Initially, I went crazy thinking about everything that I had to do and the person I had to become. I couldn’t shake off the feeling of not being the ‘perfect mom’ we see on Internet and everywhere in media.

Still, somewhere I knew that I will get around to doing this mom-thing in a way that suited me and my family. I knew because I had already dealt with a society biased towards ‘beauty’ and that wanted me to do what I was ‘supposed to do’. This slowly yet constantly increasing confidence didn’t come overnight. It came when I started feeling comfortable in my own skin. It came when I made peace with my appearance. It came when I left my ‘secure’ job and explored opportunities that interested me. It came when I saw my daughter growing well and turning into a clingy toddler. Yes, even a nerve-wracking toddler is a sign that you are a great mother because the baby trusts you completely. This all contributed to my realization of Self Love.

Self Love

I am dancing on my own and many times with my daughter in my arms (clinginess!) but the music in my mind says that it’s going to be alright. And I trust that music now because right now I am the most self-assured, I have ever been. This is Self Love and I am proud to be moving in the right direction. I am never going to be perfect but I am just right so Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake…

I shake it off, I shake it off.

Do you practice Self Love?

I thank Priyanka Sehgal who blogs at https://mommynshanaya.wordpress.com for introducing me. She is a dear friend who writes about things close to her heart on her blog. I would also take the opportunity to introduce Sthuti Panigrahy Singh who blogs at https://mommyaccountsays.wordpress.com.

It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers, am celebrating Women’s Day with a twist. This post is a part of #UnapologeticGirlz Blogathon hosted by @mylittlemuffin_mom @mommyvoyage and @themomsagas, sponsored by @kaurageousyou.

9 Learnings of A One Year Old Mom

Seriously, I am not into learning things I don’t want to but somehow mommyhood has managed to teach me few needed and many not needed lessons. Some are of the life-skill variety and others are just there because I had no idea what motherhood comprises of. I have learnt funny and the not so funny realities but mind you I haven’t mastered any of these. So let’s see exactly What Motherhood Has Taught Me-

1.Patience

A mother is supposed to be really patient but I’m sure that most of us are not built that way. We are not born with patience (have you ever seen a really accommodating baby?) and it comes only with experience. I am lucky to have an embodiment of tolerance in my husband and he’s the one who pointed out that being impatient is one of my shortcomings.

Then came Idhaya who drives me crazy with her antics and there is little I can do about it. The only option I have is to learn the art of patience. I yell at her but not as much as I would have yelled at another baby doing the same things so it’s progress.

What Motherhood Has Taught Me

2.Mess and  happiness can live together

This coming from an organization freak is a scandalous statement! I don’t have ‘before’ pictures with me or I would’ve shared a ‘before and after’ scenario of my home. My home now basically looks like a garbage dump but you know what, I have to turn a blind eye towards it. What Motherhood Has Taught Me is to look beyond such things. The reason being I don’t get much time to myself and whatever precious ‘me time’ I get is for doing things that are just for myself like Instagram, online shopping or reading. And so we live happily in a messy house.

3.Love

Not that I don’t love my husband and honestly I still love him a little more than Idhaya (sorry baby!). The difference is that in motherly love, I only give without getting any favours. Loving unconditionally is What Motherhood Has Taught Me. Please don’t tell me that her smile and happiness is what I get because for me it’s a by-product of what I do for her.

what motherhood feels like

4.Unselfishness

Ha! So this is another life-skill that I am trying to imbibe. My current level of unselfishness is putting Idhaya’s needs before mine and giving her my rabbit soft toy that I have kept very carefully since last 5 years.

5.Confidence

Want to asses my progress? Asses my confidence because it’s the most important of the things What Motherhood Has Taught Me. I have risen above people-pleasing and judgments after becoming a mom. I would add that my frequency of judging others has also come down drastically.

6.Letting Go

Letting go of things that won’t matter in a few years from now What Motherhood Has Taught Me. It makes your mind free and I have felt it lately. Initially when Idhaya won’t sleep and I rocked her, I used to think that she will get habitual of this but I carried on thinking that it will continue for a maximum of three years or so. Guess what? She doesn’t need to be rocked to fall asleep anymore. When she’s sleepy, I simply lay her next to me and enjoy her happy smile before she falls asleep on her own.

mommy blog india

7.There is no best way to mother

Oh yes and many moms will agree with me (though my mom never will) on this. Your mothering style is unique and what works for you is the best (don’t be abusive though!).

8.I am amazing

I still can’t believe that I have not only become pregnant, given birth but have even managed to raise a baby on my own. With a lot of help from the Internet of-course but I am so proud of myself.

9.Sleep is not mandatory

Idhaya used to wake up every 2-3 hours till 3-4 months of age but luckily she almost always went back to sleep after feeding. Now she wakes up just once at night that too because of hunger. There are off days but mostly it’s great. Now, for a sleepyhead like me, waking up at odd hours wasn’t easy but now I’m habitual of it. I have realized that I can do with interrupted sleep.

This is What Motherhood Has Taught Me. What are your Learnings From Motherhood?