How My Husband Participates in Bringing Up Our Girl?

I know that I took a break after writing just two posts but it wasn’t because of the lack of ideas rather due to a holiday we took. All the preparations along with managing my baby and kind of looking after my house along with Instagram and Facebook made sure that I had no time for writing even though it’s the first reason behind the existence of TRM18. Now that I am back, I am planning to put up one post per week.

Today’s post is about my better half who not only wanted a baby but was always there to participate in rearing her. He has been all for Father-Daughter Love and bonding. Nowadays, most of the fathers are completely involved with their kids and it’s a welcome change. If you want to create a baby, you have to help in sustaining her and not just financially. Mr. TRM18 took me to every doctor’s appointment during pregnancy and he was with me throughout the labour and delivery process. Did I mention that I left a lot of nail-marks on his hands? 😉

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He works in a highly demanding corporate setup and doesn’t have a lot of time on his hands but this doesn’t deter him from spoiling Idhaya 🙂 The father of my baby does everything from buying diapers to changing them. From washing her dirty sheets to bathing her. From playing with her to feeding her. From trimming her nails to putting her to sleep. Obviously, he is not perfect like me 😉 but his interest and desire to learn defies every shortcoming. A strong Father-Daughter Love bond is formed by such big and little things.

I might be saying all the good things but in reality when he falters in his fatherly duties like adding all the water to formula at one go, I give him a earful but he doesn’t give up. He loves Idhaya more than I do and now when I see her cozying up to her Papa, my heart flutters.

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My Husband has always been interested in the household- he buys curtains and bedsheets, tends to his little balcony-garden, cooks, does household chores and like me, he loves to shop. These were the early signs which indicated that he will be a hands-on father 🙂 He always supports me in what I want to do and this ensures me that Idhaya is in good company. I would add that if such a happy child is born to me, the credit has to go to the Papa.

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We will keep messing up and learning as we go but it’s each other’s support that keeps us going. A father is not a babysitter and he has to be as much a part of his kids’ lives as the mother. In most cases, the mom is closer to the baby as she is the primary caregiver yet a father can be as close if not more. He just needs to be there for the baby and give her his undivided attention. I have read that the children whose father is more affectionate and involved in their lives have better social and emotional development. And no, being involved doesn’t mean being a helicopter or not giving any privacy to the kids. Just like mothers, fathers cannot always ace the task of parenting and we have to accept this fact for the sake of our own sanity. According to me, this Father-Daughter Love and bonding is what will make Idhaya a more open and secure person.

Now time for some soul-searching so that I don’t loose it on Idhaya’s ‘imperfect’ Papa this evening 😛

Love

The Reluctant Mom18

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